A retired engineer determined to prevent his home being sacrificed to the sea is battling on, despite being denied the right to maintain his self-made sea defences.
"Rockwilder Producer of 50 Cent "Do you think about me" Super Producer Rocwilder has a new secret weapon! Beat Thang Virtual!!! Beat Thang Virtual is the hottest new beat making machine on the planet. If you aint up on thangz...... Better watch this! Rockwilder just Finished Producing 50 cents new single "Do you think about me" on it […]
Time Out presents our insider's guide to the best markets in London – including food at Borough, antiques at Portobello, vintage fashion at Camden and bric-a-brac at Broadway
New to classical music but not sure what to see? Read our updates on the Barbican's Great Performers season and hear the world's best orchestras, conductors and soloists.
Our Film, Music, Theatre, Big Smoke, and Food and Drink sections are tweeting from the front line of London life - follow them to hear the latest insider scoops
Note:Due to the complexity and difficulty level of their contents, each course will accept a maximum of 8 participants each.
TOPIC 1 – How to fill up the ice cube trays:
Step by step, with slide presentation.
TOPIC 2 – The toilet paper roll:
Do they grow on the holders? Roundtable discussion.
TOPIC 3 – How to fight cerebral atrophy:
Remembering birthdays, anniversaries, other important dates and calling when you’re going to be late. Cerebral shock therapy sessions and full lobotomies offered.
TOPIC 4 – Fundamental differences between the laundry hamper and the floor:
Pictures and explanatory graphics.
TOPIC 5 – The after-dinner dishes and silverware:
Can they levitate and fly into the kitchen sink? Examples on video.
TOPIC 6 – Loss of identity:
Losing the remote to your significant other. Helpline support and support groups.
TOPIC 7 – Learning how to find things:
Starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down while screaming. Open forum.
TOPIC 8 – Health watch:
Bringing her flowers is not harmful to your health. Graphics and audio tape.
TOPIC 9 – Real men ask for directions when lost:
Real life estimonials.
TOPIC 10 – Is it genetically impossible to sit quietly as she parallel parks?
Driving simulation.
TOPIC 11 – Learning to live:
Basic differences between your mother and your wife. Online class and role playing.
TOPIC 12 – How to be the ideal shopping companion:
Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques.
Upon completion of the course, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
If you’ve ever been part of a restructure/review at your workplace, you’ll know that someone will always lose out in order to accomodate others. Sure it can be worded in so many other ways, task reduction, streamlining efficiency, and other fancy terms which can pretty much all equate to losing a job. Below is an uncanny example of the bureaucracy that plagues the ethics of our organisations:
Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert. Congress said,
- “Someone may steal from it at night.”
So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job. Then Congress said,
- “How does the watchman do his job without instruction?”
So they created a planning department and hired two people, one person to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies. Then Congress said,
- “How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?”
So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people. One to do the studies and one to write the reports. Then Congress said,
- “How are these people going to get paid?”
So they created the following positions, a time keeper, and a payroll officer, then hired two people. Then Congress said,
- “Who will be accountable for all of these people?”
So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal Secretary. Then Congress said,
- “We have had this command in operation for one year and we are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost.”
Calling all Origami enthusiasts. I came across this wonderfully designed way to keep your life in check without the digital requirements. It’s like making a mini paper-book for your back pocket. Still lost? I’ll let them explain it:
“The PocketMod is a small book with guides on each page. These guides or templates, combined with a unique folding style, enable a normal piece of paper to become the ultimate note card.”
There’s load’s of PocketMods available already, by way of games or exercise regimes. Personally, I plan to get my six-pack grind on in time for the Summer showboat. See below for the link.
Yes, you read right, it’s the one of the greatest games ever, and now you can play it on YouTube. It’s nothing great in terms of playability, but unique and clever. Appreciate, and press the play button.
IMO: After a weekend of ‘F5’s, I finally managed to get mine. Did you get yours? But who is it? What is it? And Why? Where? When? With so much confusion, excitement, disdain, and anticipation surrounding it’s release, I thought I’d compile an easy to understand overview of the whole thing. Well, easy for me anyway:
Windows 7 is the new OS from Microsoft due to be released later this year. The Beta version is a test release for the public to try it out before it is released officially. It is not the finished product.
The initial idea was to have it available for download for one weekend only with 2.5 million activation keys available. Fat chance. It was overwhelmed by the demand and was pretty much forced to extend availabililty until the end of January with no cap on activation keys. As far as I know.
Why bother? Initial reports and feedbacks have pretty much said it is amazing. And it does look it. It has been compared to Vista Ultimate, except much faster and with all the bugs ironed out. So it’s what Vista should have been then. Apparently, boot time is meant to be less than 30 seconds, although my XP does this even with a hangover.
Let’s be honest – Vista was what we call ‘waste’. It should have received nothing but ‘air’. Windows 7 promises to bring OS sexiness back to Microsoft, and it seems to be doing so. For more info,see below for the links.
Once you’ve installed it, make sure you install updates immediately, in particular update KB961367. Failure to do so will result in the possible damage of your MP3 files.
This is a BETA version, not the final product. This means finding, reporting and fixing bugs. Dual-boot this baby unless you’re au fait with PC’s. As much as I trust the opinions, August is a long way away and I’m not taking any chances.
I first came across this website when I noticed it in my referrers list. Upon checking it out, I noticed it’s a portal for viewing blogs that have just been updated. The page refreshes at regular intervals but you can pause at a blog you like. The ‘how does it work’ link is a bit much to take in though, but that’s only if you want to know how and what the site is. I was just happy to see mine pop up on the site. As weird as it is, you’ll find yourself on the site longer than you expect. Either that, or I’m just sad.
Having missed their ferry, two men stole a trawler from Holyhead to get them back to Dublin. After two hours going round in circles, the men worked out how to use the radio and sent out a Mayday.
In Delaware, a man robbed a pizza delivery girl and realized afterwards he fancied a date with her. He called the girl up and was shortly arrested after she politely declined and turned him in to the authorities.
In Florida, a man burst into a bank wearing a ski mask and carrying a gun. Aiming his gun at the guard, the thief yelled, “FREEZE, MOTHER-STICKERS, THIS IS A F**K UP!” Of course, the guard, tellers, and customers promptly started laughing and the thief fled the scene of the almost-crime.
A drug dealer in South Carolina walked into his local police station, dropped a bag of cocaine on the counter, and complained that it was substandard cut and he wanted the person who sold it to him to be arrested immediately. Maybe the drugs impaired his judgment on this decision.
A man from Mansfield was jailed for 10 months after he claimed he was unable to walk without the use of two walking sticks. He raked in more than £20,000 in benefits but was caught after being photographed running the 2005 London marathon.
After making off with a television, a French burglar was caught when he returned to the scene of the crime to steal the television’s remote control.
The Belgium news agency Belga reported in November that a man suspected of robbing a jewelry store in Liege said he couldn’t have done it because he was busy breaking into a school at the same time. Police then arrested him for breaking into the school.
Dennis Newton was on trial in Oklahoma City for the armed robbery of a convenience store. When the store manager testified that Newton was the robber, he jumped up, accused the woman of lying, and then said, “I should have blown your head off.” The defendant paused, then quickly added, “If I’d been the one that was there.”The jury took 20 minutes to convict Newton and recommended a 30-year sentence.
A Chinese man caught shoplifting while wearing women’s underwear told police he believed the lingerie made his crimes undetectable. The 26-year-old said he was very superstitious and that he had heard that if he wore women’s underwear, his shoplifting would go undetected. He was found to be wearing the lingerie when officers strip-searched him.
A man in Minnesota held up a liquor store, demanding all the money in the till. While the cashier was putting the money in a bag the robber asked for a large bottle of whisky from behind the counter. The cashier refused to hand it over as he didn’t believe that the man of the legal drinking age in America. The man produced his identification card to prove he was 21 and finally left with the money and the whisky. By the time he got home the police were waiting for him as the cashier had promptly called the police and supplied them with his name and address.
IMO: It has become increasingly apparent over recent months that desktop wallpapers with calendars can help in keeping even the most laziest of people in check. Well, in theory anyway. There is a nice collection of November 2008 wallpapers available from Smashing Magazine, who have compiled a collection including many different resolutions per image. There is also the option of having the desktop wallpaper without a calendar. Take a look at the samples below, and go to the website page to download your resolution, and whether or not you want it with a calendar. See below for the link.
Hijacked from here, although the included video clips have been omitted because IMO there is too much YouTube embedding on blogs. If you really want to watch something, you can find it yourself.
“Unless you’ve had your head buried in some sort of technology sand, whatever that is, you can’t have missed Apple’s iPhone and 3G successor over the last 18 months. Celebrated by geeks, trendy folk and muggers alike, the talented touch screen mobile has re-invented the smartphone.
What you might have missed however was the unveiling of a new rival in the touchy feely phone stakes this week, the T-Mobile G1. Made by HTC, it’s the first phone to run Google’s open source operating system Android. It’s out in November, but the toolkit is already available, meaning those crazy coders (bless’em) are beavering away to come up with some prize programs for us come release date. Confused about which giant computing company deserves your green? Read on to see the best each phone has to offer.”
Top 5 Apps on the G1:
1:Street View
Combining your standard GPS with Google’s paintstakingly mapped photos of every street in the country means you have no excuse to get lost ever again.
2: Pac-Man
Not just a rip-off either, but the original arcade classic. Namco are even putting in tilt and trackball controls to give it extra life. Chomp chomp.
3: PicSay
This clever little app lets you edit images on the fly, so you can get rid of that guy lurking in the back of the photo with his finger up his nose before you post it on Facebook.
4: Ecorio
For the more environmentally friendly owners, Ecorio tracks your carbon footprint while driving. GPS with a conscience.
5: Cab4me
Scrap all those taxi cards you’ve got in your wallet – this program will call up your nearest minicab office with one button push. Or should that be tap?
Top 5 Apps on the iPhone:
1: BBC iPlayer
If you’re in a wi-fi area, you can catch up on Neighbours on your phone. If the BBC hadn’t lost it, that is, fools.
2: Sling Player
It’s still in development limbo, but when it finally launches, Sling Box owners will be able to stream their TV or DVR straight to their iPhone. Now that’s TV on demand.
3: I Am Rich
Sadly not available on the App Store anymore, this app offered you a glowing light on your screen. For $999. All this does is prove you either have serious cash to burn, or are sectionable. Probably both.
4: Airremote
Don’t like how your home remote controls have buttons you have to push? Use your iPhone’s touch interface with this app that makes your mobile a universal remote.
5: Sega Genesis Emulator
Get some nineties nostalgia on your phone. You have to be a bit naughty and jailbreak the iPhone, but it’s worth it to have Sonic blasting across your screen on the train.
This funny little thing has probably done the rounds on your emails already, but still…
The following are a sampling of real answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation’s driving school.
Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? A: What for? He can’t see my license plate.
Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, “Guns don’t kill people. I do.”
Q: When driving through fog, what should you use? A: Your car.
Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident? A: Be too drunk to find your keys.
Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving? A: I’d probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully? A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed? A: Make eye contact and wave “hello” if she is cute.
Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light? A: The color.
Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic? A: Heavy psychedelics.
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem? A: Carry loaded weapons.
Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer? A: It would be tough to be an idiot all day long.
